I’ve Never Understood
By Anonymous Daughter, Morazán
I’ve never understood my mother’s paranoia when she hears certain words:
coyote,
los papeles,
la migra,
ilegal.
Whenever she has to say them,
she whispers as if someone was spying on her.
I’ve never understood why my mother covers her ears when she hears the sound of a helicopter.
I’ve never understood why my mother carriers a cross in her purse,
in her keychain and in her necklace.
I’ve never understood why my mother doesn’t trust any men,
whether it’s a teacher, a priest, a doctor, a family member, or her own father.
I’ve never understood why she’s never returned to El Salvador even though I’ve begged her to take me.
She simply replies: No tengo nada qué hacer allá.
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